Expansion request Vorey Isles co-shared with Nyantastan

[Gotneska]

Hello fellow Eurthan’s

 

I’d like to create this NPC to farther help with my nations history. But also make it to where these historical islands are able to become a nation once again.

Below is a map of the area I’d like to create a a NPC. And the name of its capital. This as said in the title is co-shared with @Nyanta we have talked and for the most part everything has been approved by Nyanta.

 

Stats about the Vorey Isles or Spring Isles

Population: 187,878

Languages: 

National: Vorease (based on Foresee)

Recognised national languages:

Götaish & Úlfapeak

Religion: Norse Paganism & Christianity 

 

History

Prehistory (6000 BC to 890 AD)

The earliest evidence of humans is dated back to between 5,200 to 2,300 BC the first peoples to live on the islands where the Geltic peoples of eastern yeetland. This was around 2,300 to 1,900 BC. The Norse populations would slowly start there take over of the isles by no later then 200 BC, this is in fact 100% archaeological proven with the discovery of Norse rock art that was found in a cave 20km east of what is the modern capital. And a another discovery of grave under what was believed to have been a natural hill.

 

Around 100 AD the Yetlandi Empire started taking control over large sections of western yeetland. This would help the Norse population farther grow and make the Geltic population be almost completely replaced. But a small population would be able to survive living on the western most island.

Middle Ages (890 to 1690 AD)

The Kingdom of Vorose (1137 to 1923)

The first Kingdom was created in 1137 with the crowning of what was the High Chiften or King of the islands and would unify the islands into my nation for the first time. At this time most historians agree that population of the islands was between 11.2 K to 14.7 K with about 1/3rd equal spit between religions.

Njordstan Union (13th to 16th Century)

Early Modern (1690 to 1840 AD)

Modern (1840 to Present)

Ulfheimr Conquest (1923)

The Ulfheimr Conquest took place in March 1923 and ended with there annexation of the islands in October of the same year. The Ulfheimr backed rebels overthrowing the monarchy and the islands gov't. On 29 October 1923 the rebel backed forces with promission from the Erilaz, had the King  hanged and then beheaded, the  Queen was beheaded and later thrown into the sea will the kings head was paraded around the capital before ending up being inpailed and hung outside the new capital offices.

Edited October 11, 2022 by Gotneska (see edit history)

[Gotneska]

Economy 

The economy of the Spring Isles is heavy based on Fishing, and Ship Building. The isles also have a small tourist market which makes up about 4% of there told economy. There biggest imports are wheat, flower, and most fruits and veggies.

[Gotneska]

Culture of the Vorosan People 

The national flag is called Old Runic

 

The colors of flag representation of the land or islands being the green runic symbol and the sea being the blue background. The first use of this flag was back in 18th century and was changed to have a black runic symbol in 1924. 
 

The state religion is Norse paganism about 95% of the population are classified as pagan in the last eat survey, next was Christianity at 3% and lastly Cordic Paganism followed by 2%. Both cordic and Christians mostly live on the western and southern islands.

Below is a image of  Cluain Ethniu which means Eithne Meadow. Is a 7th century Christian Monastery located on the Isle of Christ.

Cluain Ethniu Is culturally important site to the islands Christians and many other Córda populations found around Gotneska and Ulfheimr. 
 

Bárurfjørður Temple is one of the oldest temples to still being actively used as a place of worship for the Norse pagan population. Having be built somewhere between 890 to 1120 AD

[Xio]

Okay, we spoke a bit on Discord but I figure it'll be best to make a full post here so you will be able to understand everything.

Firstly, I won't be accepting this expansion and I will be denying you any expansions for the foreseeable future (that includes you gaining any land in Ulfheimr). My first reason for declining your expansion is that you still have not yet qualified for expansions as you have not partaken in any roleplay with another member.* Ulfheimr will be transferred to @Nyanta as their NPC if they decide to continue with the expansion (with or without your help) or Ulfheimr will just be removed from the map.

*Edit: Recently brought to my attention that you did have an interaction with another member beyond one post, must've missed it when I combed through your posts, sorry. However the other two reasons still stand and does not change my end verdict in any meaningful way as the other two points stand.

Secondly, you started this expansion without any semblance of an application. Your only evidence of this having been an expansion in the first place was with a vague scribbled map with the Spring Islands labelled 'NPC' and in Nyanstan's expansion proposal it wasn't even labelled NPC but 'to be decided' with zero follow-up. Not every small thing needs to be planned but this is clearly a significant thing if you're looking to roleplay as an undecided NPC nation declaring its own independence without any forewarning to anyone. Not your neighbours, not the staff, nobody. It was only once I actually asked you about this on Discord did you tell me it was an expansion in the first place. This is the second reason I will be declining this expansion as you were acting in bad faith hoping to slip this by staff.

Thirdly, both threads for this expansion (here and here) is discordant and is below the expectations of quality we ask for on Eurth. They're mostly one paragraph long filler describing the actions of one thread in the other, there was no need to make two threads for what is clearly a single, self-contained narrative. There is no structure or presentation to the posts, everything is present in the same paragraphs and you mix in-character posts and out-of-characters posts in the same threads with no distinction between the two making for a confusing story. This is the third reason I am declining your expansion is due to poor quality of writing.

At this point I would be asking for your expansion's stats, but I don't see you qualifying for an expansion any time soon. I will be happy to help you improve your writing skills on Discord or in a separate thread on this forum as a mentor, especially so as no other mentors have spoken to you about this.

This isn't me threatening or belittling you, this is me as an RP mentor putting my foot down but also offering you a way to improve so that you can actually reach your potential on Eurth. This is also an invitation to anyone else who feels as though they could improve their writing skills but are perhaps a bit self-conscious asking publicly. I may not be the best but I - and the other RP mentors - are here to help.

Edited October 11, 2022 by Xio (see edit history)

[Gotneska]

4 hours ago, Xio said:

Okay, we spoke a bit on Discord but I figure it'll be best to make a full post here so you will be able to understand everything.

Firstly, I won't be accepting this expansion and I will be denying you any expansions for the foreseeable future (that includes you gaining any land in Ulfheimr). My first reason for declining your expansion is that you still have not yet qualified for expansions as you have not partaken in any roleplay with another member.* Ulfheimr will be transferred to @Nyanta as their NPC if they decide to continue with the expansion (with or without your help) or Ulfheimr will just be removed from the map.

*Edit: Recently brought to my attention that you did have an interaction with another member beyond one post, must've missed it when I combed through your posts, sorry. However the other two reasons still stand and does not change my end verdict in any meaningful way as the other two points stand.

Secondly, you started this expansion without any semblance of an application. Your only evidence of this having been an expansion in the first place was with a vague scribbled map with the Spring Islands labelled 'NPC' and in Nyanstan's expansion proposal it wasn't even labelled NPC but 'to be decided' with zero follow-up. Not every small thing needs to be planned but this is clearly a significant thing if you're looking to roleplay as an undecided NPC nation declaring its own independence without any forewarning to anyone. Not your neighbours, not the staff, nobody. It was only once I actually asked you about this on Discord did you tell me it was an expansion in the first place. This is the second reason I will be declining this expansion as you were acting in bad faith hoping to slip this by staff.

Thirdly, both threads for this expansion (here and here) is discordant and is below the expectations of quality we ask for on Eurth. They're mostly one paragraph long filler describing the actions of one thread in the other, there was no need to make two threads for what is clearly a single, self-contained narrative. There is no structure or presentation to the posts, everything is present in the same paragraphs and you mix in-character posts and out-of-characters posts in the same threads with no distinction between the two making for a confusing story. This is the third reason I am declining your expansion is due to poor quality of writing.

At this point I would be asking for your expansion's stats, but I don't see you qualifying for an expansion any time soon. I will be happy to help you improve your writing skills on Discord or in a separate thread on this forum as a mentor, especially so as no other mentors have spoken to you about this.

This isn't me threatening or belittling you, this is me as an RP mentor putting my foot down but also offering you a way to improve so that you can actually reach your potential on Eurth. This is also an invitation to anyone else who feels as though they could improve their writing skills but are perhaps a bit self-conscious asking publicly. I may not be the best but I - and the other RP mentors - are here to help.

I completely understand my writing and work have fallen short. I’m sorry for posting things that don’t meet the Eurth rules. I’m very passionate about this so I will work to make my posts better and will also try to become more active on the international aka Eurth community.

 

Thank you for responding,

Gotneska

[Rhodellia]

I concur with @Xio. Essentially, what needs to be done is that:

1) You should write an explanation of why this NPC is needed and how, using the NPC, you intend to further enrich both Gotneska and Eurth's wider lores and narratives. We need a better idea of what your vision is with your NPCs and where you intend to go with them.

2) A bit of overlap with Point No. 1, but you should write a more detailed outline of the process by which you intend to integrate the NPC into your nation's lore and narratives. For example, if the nation of Goteska wants to annex or essentally vassalise the NPC (in the sense that the NPC will generally go along with whatever the parent nation does), you should explain the steps that will be taken to reasonably sway it politically, economically, or diplomatically. As a general rule, the bigger the addition the to-be-integrated NPC will add to your nation's overall power level or territory, the more time and effort is expected in 'earning' it.

3) You should write more long-form narrative posts. Long-form storytelling is the preferred way of writing expansions. This includes short stories and longer reads divided into chapters. We need more of these as evidence that you have the ability and reliability to execute big writing projects. While quality is of course valued over quantity (so you shouldn't fret too much over reaching massive arbitrary wordcounts), any Expansion RP thread is supposed to be a fairly big undertaking. And

4) You should build up a bigger track record of collaborative storytelling and roleplaying with other members. Seeking consent and negotiating details over Discord is one thing, but actually having all of that lead-up come into fruition in the form of an active forum thread with multiple people coordinating and posting back-and-forth interlinked posts is a different thing entirely.

I think that's about it

Edited October 11, 2022 by Rhodellia (see edit history)