Brain Pain on the Sports Plain

[Afropa]

The government of Afropa needs your help!

The Issue

Rhinoball - a sport that is extremely popular in Afropa but not so much anywhere else - is causing a slew of concussions in Afropan schools. Brain trauma from the head-on collisions is causing cognitive problems and - on occasion - deaths.

The Debate

1. “You have to stop this madness!” yells Nikita Belcher, the mother of an eighthback for Dieudonné High School. “My son has received so many concussions that his grades are dropping. To hell with tradition, our children’s fragile brains are more important!”

2. “Come on, president Pierre Panza. You’re not actually thinking about this, are you?” says Tina Grimes, PR rep from the Dieudonné Wyverns, a professional rhinoball team. “I know it’s tough, but without rhinoball in the schools, who will be the great pro athletes of the future? Need I mention that rhinoball is a storied part of Afropan culture dating back generations? You wouldn’t want to mess that up, would you?”

3. “It’s not just rhinoball,” mentions Carmen Nagasawa, a techie joining the conversation via Trype. “Think about legball. Concussions happen there all the time. It’s just not in the news anywhere as often. And then there’s hoopball. They wipe each other out all of the time. Us video gamers have fun without ever knocking our skulls together. I propose we ban all physical sports. It’s only the safest op-” she says before the screen turns off with a security guard twirling the plug.

Edited July 9, 2018 by Afropa (see edit history)