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Let er rip!


Stoned Smurfs
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People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

 

People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

 

 

When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Screw off. What good is a goddamn cake if you can't eat it? What, should I eat someone else's cake instead?

 

 

When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

 

When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dicknose, I paid $9.00 to come to the theatre and stare at the frigging ceiling up there. What did you come here for?

 

When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

 

When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going? You should know asshole, you frigging pulled me over.

 

When people say "Life is short." What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What? Are they going to do something that's longer?

 

When people ask "Can I BORROW a piece of paper?" Sure, but please don't return the favor! It's one god damn piece of paper!

 

When you are waiting for the bus and someone ask you "Did the bus come yet?" If the bus came I would not be standing here asshole!

 

People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?

 

 

~Pot~

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People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

Hey, I always do that... better to get up once and look for the remote, then to get up a thousand times to push that button. unsure.gif

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When people say "Life is short." What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What? Are they going to do something that's longer?

 

~Pot~

I tend to say 'life is short...so enjoy it!' sometimes...It is because no one knows when they're turn will come, so to speak...basically saying make the best of it while you are able to...cuz anythings possible! biggrin.gif

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another thing that bugs me is why cant women be more like guns? have you ever compaired the two?

 

You can trade an old 45 for a new 22.

 

 

 

 

 

You can keep a gun at home, and have another when you're on the road.

 

 

 

 

 

If you admire a friend's gun, and tell him so, he probably will let you try it out a few times.

 

 

 

 

 

Your primary gun doesn't mind if you have another gun for back-up.

 

 

 

 

 

Your gun will stay with you, even if you run out of ammo.

 

 

 

 

 

A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

 

 

 

 

 

Guns function normally every day of the month.

 

 

 

 

 

A gun doesn't ask, "Do these grips make me look fat?"

 

 

 

 

 

A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

AND OF COURSE.....

THE BIGGEST DIFFERENCE

BETWEEN WOMEN & GUNS

 

 

 

 

 

 

You can get a silencer for a gun.

 

 

 

 

 

AMEN.

 

 

 

 

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