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Found 8 results

  1. Roué, the capital of the Republic of Paranne (Lycian: République da Paranne). Three Shffahkians are sitting in a limousine. And then what? Nothing, it would make a fine set-up for a joke is all. Says Louque Admie, a lanky thin pale man in a suit, whom some call him the living embodiment of an academic possessing several degrees and qualifications of various backgrounds, who also happens to be the sitting president of the Collective of Ministers. Holding a pile of papers barely together with several falling from his clutches with every bump the limousine meets. Sounds like a pretty terrible joke. It ain't even got anythin' after. The three should be doing something... Like arm-wrestling! Replies a far heftier man, Rémy Rémy. Tall, outgoing and radiating a presence of courage, he is the current president of the Shffahkian Council. Never one to say much and one to almost always forget something important, a popular rumour of him is that he forgot his last own last name. Well, I didn't say it would be a fine joke per se. Says Admie as he kneels down to pick up the myriad of documents he dropped during the limousine ride. But rather that it would make a good set-up - ça veut dire - a start to one which then predisposes the listener to the comedic twist, thereby... Agh, great this year's documents for the Port-Réel Celebrations budget are besmirched in coffee. Ah, so that's where that went. Says Adélaïde Larue as she bends to pick up the leaking thermal mug putting it back on the small pile of thermal mugs of varying colours next to her. Why did you even bring those files, to begin with? Are you planning a parade float of your own or something? Well excuse me, but I said, many a time, I wasn't going to stop this discussion over the budget of these celebrations for anything. That includes this project of yours, going about galavanting across Paranne. As if the situation in Shffahkiaville isn't bad enough without you constantly avoiding our budget talks. Also, based on that pile haven't you had enough coffee? That addiction of yours is beginning to spiral out of control. You see... Larue pauses for a moment to sip her coffee. There's a difference between an addiction and a passion. Of course, there is. One is an all-consuming fire while the other is a spark of enlightenment, correct? Which stop is next again? Interrupts Rémy looking at one the documents detailing their trip around Paranne. Is it the At-risk Disenfranchised Indigenous Women's Mental Health Association or Parannais Mining Rights Society? No, we already were at the At-risk Disenfranchised Indigenous Women's Mental Health Association back in Térémaie. Does the hour-long hike to the mining site where the protests were happening ring a bell? We had to walk all the way up the mountain because they don't allow transportation vehicles that far up the mountain. Those were women? They were by far too hairy to be women; one even had a beard I'm pretty sure. You're sure they weren't the miners? More importantly, you call that a mountain? I've climbed hills that were bigger than that! They were shouting in... Louque Admie attempts to say before being cut off by Rémy. And I've climbed them without any equipment what so ever! That's great, but how do you explain the fact that they were very clearly throwing what seemed like dirt towards mining equipment? Maybe they were protesting salary cuts? They were shouting in an indigenous language... How should I know what they were speaking? And why are we even going out of our way to talk to some insane sasquatches up in the mountains? They can't even vote what's the point in that? Larue intervenes and says Paranne loves to boast of its indigenous cultural presence. Despite only 15% or so of the population actually being made up of that particular group. So making good with that important minority smooths procedures in the long run. Besides the president's husband suggested it to us prior to our visit. Which one of them was the queer one again? asks Rémy abruptly. What on Eurth do you mean? inquires Admie, flabbergasted. Émeric Dutoit is the first openly "queer," as you so blatantly put it, president of Paranne. His election was seen as a big step forward in the country. Ah, so it's Émeric and not Sylvain? By definition, they both are! Decries Admie, frustratedly at Rémy. And please, do not employ such a word during this trip. What's wrong with calling the sky blue? The negative connotations the word drags around as baggage. Drag, don't tell me they... Says Rémy before being interrupted by Larue Please just stop for goodness' sake. What if it comes up during dinner? I highly doubt this particular subject will come up during our dinner answers Admie. I'm sure we can converse over other topics such as the new ADIWMHA spokesperson... Sasquatch! Interrupts Rémy. Or perhaps the unification deal Larue continues then returning to her coffee. Ah yes, back to that. So after the dinner, we have two stops left depending on how long the pursuing negotiations are Admie preludes. They were which again? Rémy asks. The Animal Rescue Centre of Roué and then the... Wouldn't the joke be better if it began with something else than three Shffahkians? inquires Rémy. Excuse me, what? Admie replies with utter despair in his eyes. Something like a Sunset Sea Islandian, a Shffahkian and a Mauridiviahn are sitting in a limousine. That does sound more like an actual joke. Larue comments. It seems like we've almost arrived, is everything ready? As ready as it can be. replies Admie sweating from anticipation. Let's just hope no arm-wrestling happens. I would say the opposite, you porcelain man! answers Rémy right as the limousine doors open to reveal the glimmer of cameras.
  2. For many years, the “Group Of Five”, an informal group of Slavic nations close to each other, have endured relative prosperity and well-being. However, with new land being snatched up left and right, the Euroführer felt that they needed to put their foot in the door. The “Group Of Five” includes the Euroführer, @Cavunia @Greater Serbia, @Poland-Lithuania, and @Girkmand. Relations have been positive with most of these countries for many years. However, that may change with a new possible land acquisition. (This will be added to over time)
  3. Wednesday, 14th February 2018 Santhope House The KIng's Equerry - "Your Majesty, The Prime Minister and the Minister for Defence." The two Ministers enter the King's private study. Both Ministers and the Equerry bow to the King. Albert II - "Prime Minister." Sir Anthony - "Your Majesty." Albert II - "Sir Henry." Sir Henry - "Your Majesty" They both bow and shake the King's hand. Albert II - "How can I help you Gentlemen?" Sir Anthony - "Well Your Majesty, as you are well aware, the Navy is undertaking a survey operation in the northwest to map out the waterways through the island groups. The commander of the task group, Captain Peter Blackwell, was in contact with the First Sea Lord and the Chief of the Defence Staff stating that the islands were to the best of his knowledge uninhabited. He sort permission from the Board, to extend the operation to a joint service operation to undertake a land survey of the island groups. Which the Board, after consultation with Sir Henry and the Attorney-General, gave their blessing. Sir Henry - "Sir, If I may. (Rolls out a maritime chart of the area, and points to the four islands). The original operation was to chart the water ways surrounding these four island groups. Part of the job they have is to also to gather information about indigenous maritime traffic, which when Captain Blackwell submitted his report, was non-existent, which lead him to believe that these islands were uninhabited. Albert II - "So Gentlemen, you're both telling me, that we've had these islands within our sphere of influence for the last one hundred and fifty years, and we haven't done anything about it? Sir Henry - "Not necessarily Sir. (He pulls a ring-bound report from his brief case). According to the survey reports along with imagery taken by our Air Forces UAV's, it says that up until at least ten to fifteen years ago, they were to some extent inhabited." Albert II - "Well what happened to them?" Sir Anthony - "Well Sir, we believe they may have migrated further west to either the Alharun or Aurelian continents." Albert II - "Ok, So this obviously doesn't require anything done on my part, so what's the matter then Gentlemen?" Sir Anthony - "Sir, Both sides of the house, the Defence Board, and members of industry have approached the cabinet pushing for us to make claim to the islands. Having said that, the Cabinet is of the opinion as well. According to the Land Survey reports, there are large mineral deposits on the islands, as well as from a defence point of view, they are positioned in a strategically important area, which would allow us to project our forces. So, we've come today Sir, for you to sign an instrument declaring that these island groups are Terra Nullis and they have been claimed by the Gallambrian Monarchy, as external territories." Albert II - "Right then, well thank you Gentlemen, this will need to be discussed with the Privy Council, and Sir Jock will be in touch with you. Thank you." Sirs Anthony & Henry - "Your Majesty." They both bow and exit the study. Sir Anthony whispering to Sir Henry - "That went better than expected."
  4. Looking at expanding Gallambria's reach 'globally' for political, economic and strategic reasons. I have an interest in these three islands/island groups. My intention is not to land grab, however to expand into islands/areas that would extend my nations reach into the northern hemisphere, but also allowing nations to access the Marenesian island group. Below is the plan I have for my expansion. As these islands are deemed "Terra Nullis" - I will be RP'ing the claims through maritime exploration by Government and Naval maritime forces.
  5. Welcome to all foriegn delegations who have ventured to Dew Point. I hope that you had a relaxing trip. Now to the issues at stake. 1) The fate of the two islands off the coast of Area #82 a ) Are they part of Area #82? b ) Can they be claimed by any nation, regardless of population limits set forth in the rules of the maps? 2) The Rules of the Map a ) What are the territory limits to any nation, in the 'in between' areas (ie, land caputed during the war, islands, etc) b ) What are legitimate reactions by other nations? Should there by any limitations. We, the Allied States of Meteorola declare the Dew Point Peace Accords (DPPA) offically open.
  6. At 01:00 hrs this morning, the military might of The Armed Republic of Paranoid Schizos was mobilized and ordered into plot 67. The reason for this is National Security. 24 hour Combat Air Patrols are in operation backed up by Airborne Early Warning Systems. The 3rd Carrier Battle Group has put to sea and established a total exclusion zone extending 5 miles from the coast of plot 67, which will be merged with our great country. 1st and 4th Shock Army and the 54th Airmobile Brigade have struck deep into the territory, encountering little resistance. The indigenous population are wary, but welcoming. A 'hearts and minds' campaign is underway and a promise to modernise and harmonise this new area of Paranoid Schizos has been pledged. A total reporting blackout is in force and will be reviewed daily. All other nations are urged to allow us to go about our business with no interference. Our forces will not fire until fired upon. So far the plan has gone well with only a handful of casualties experienced within the Task Force.
  7. The situation in the Northwestern Europa had just started to normalize again as the governments of Vanarambaion and S.S.S.S agreed to stop hostilities for a week. Meanwhile however at the other side of the continent was boiling a new cauldron of troubles. The Byzantine royal family had become a target for an unknown group of assassins and in the most serious assassination attempts yet the Byzantine Emperor had been nearly killed and was lying unconscious in hospital forcing his son to take his duties. What was even more worrying was that Vanarambaian troops had captured several dozen people similar to the assassins during the conflict in the north. These were then turned to Byzantines and surely they are never heard again. The other governments of Europa had expressed their condolences and offered aid to Byzantines. Vanarambaion had even sent a team of shadow corps to aid Byzantine troops to find the assassins. Who are these people and where they come from? What were their motives?
  8. **Breaking News from Stoned Smurfs** "Hello, I am Ann Ryder from SPOT radio out of Potsville, Stoned Smurfs. We are broadcasting to you live outside of the Green Movements HQ. I have acquired a top secrete memo from President Pot himself declaring the two islands located to the east of the S.S.S.S. official territory. Many have considered the furthest island its own nation or that of the nation above it. We here at SPOT radio feel this is just another example of how oppressive our government is. The memo also outlines plans to turn each island into its own military base and conduct exercises on each. One island will be turned into a naval base and they plan to make a man made lake big enough to repair many major naval ships at once. The other will be strictly for air assaults and airports. We believe this should show all of Europa Pot's true intentions. The President and this administration is hell bent on ugh..." The camera is knocked out of focus for a few seconds and then comes in to view once it is settled on the ground. What we see next is two rather large men dressed in dark blue suits angrily escort and woman and what appears to be an unconscious man off the premises. **End of transmission**
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